Friday, November 28, 2008

P/S : I LOVE YOU


there are million billion ppl in this world,
and it's not easy for me to find a man like him,
who loves and cares for me so much...
and i dun wanna lose him...
this is not my first love,
i'd tried diff kind of r'ships
and i dun really need to search around
and try other guys to prove it to myself tat he's the one........
but to make my dreams come true...
there are alternatives.

the connection between one person wif another..
is very chemical..
when u add smthg in,
it reacts differently...
and i'm afraid of adding in the wrong thing..

Tuesday, November 18, 2008



16 November 2008



This morning, I went to church with Erica and Irene. I met Erica at the library, around 11am. and then, we walk to the Jesmond Parish Church after Irene joined us. The church was... juz like wat we usually saw in those movies, typical English church. And for me, that's interesting!!








In fact, we planned to have a bowl of spicy noodle for our lunch at Curry Capital. If you can finish the bowl, then the food is free! and you can get a certificate for it. However, the shop will only be open at 6:30pm every sunday. So, we went to Lao's buffet.



The Curry Capital





Lau's buffet

after lunch, i went to shop around. bought 3 shirts from H & M... I took 4 shirts to try, and all fits me nicely. However, due to credit limit, i can only buy 3 of them... i din choose the 4th bcuz, it's a sexy pyjamas.. and... i don't really need it... hahaha..... after tat, i walked home.

when i get home, i show my dear all my new clothes thru webcam... and he says i look good in them, but he's worry... hahaha... take it easy, baby... my every beauty is for u, and only you... cuz u deserve it. :) i wanna bring out all the best things within me, and they are ALL for you! :)

my babe sleep at 7am m'sia time. bcuz of me. he wanna make thgs clear, and set out some "rules". and, i guess i'd hurt him. Baby, i'm sorry. But, i really did nth... :)

when we were talking thru skype, he said "i warn you, dun u ever go clubbing anymore. If you wanna be my gf, u better dun let me find out that u do anything that betray me.." at tat moment, i was shocked... why wil he suddenly say such thing..

after my dinner, i came up immediately and wanna talk to him again, but he was on call with his fren... this is d 1st time he choose not to talk wif me, but with his fren. fine. it's ok... but, relating all wat had happened, i doubted.... whether he was angry with me, or he was indeed, talking to a girl.... but i dun thk it will be the second one.. cuz i know he loves me much.

when he ended his conversation with his fren, he talk to me. he asked me to rmb tat, he is my bf. and keep asking me not to hide thgs from him. if he found that out, he will never forgive me. however, if i have any guy tat i like, i can juz tell him. he doesn't care if i have anyone i like or i have another bf, but these can only happen when he's not with me anymore. These harsh words, made me scare... and wonder wat makes him say so... i did nth but only chat wif frens... when i said "okey", he said... "when i saw u say okey, it means a lot to me." Babe, don't be too jumpy, k? and this reaction makes me sad... cuz i felt that you're hurt. my heart bleed, if u are hurt... don't be unhappy... i love you. .

he said he knew tat i have a close guy fren, a guy who can make me smile when we chat... and when i told him tat, yea.. i have a close guy fren... he said.. "now you tell me the truth, and u piss me off." i wanted to explain.. but he say i'm bullshitting... he doesn't wanna listen to me.. however, wif my kind of attitude, i sure will find a way to explain and make it clear, if i'm not guilty. I DID NOTHING AT ALL!!!!!!!!!!

Do you thk tat i can juz forget the things happened between us within these 4 years and start another relationship with another person who i barely know? I'm not such a person. 4 years, it's not a short period of time. and it takes lotsa effort and hard work to maintain this 4-year r'ship. NOT EASY AT ALL. and you should've know tat, you're IRREPLACEABLE. i know i'm kinda bad temper, i'm sorry if sometimes i hurt your feeling, but i will not, never ever ever ever i want to replace you with another person. NO!

what happens within these 4 years, the memories we'd built up for ourselves, it's not tat easy to be forgotten. I'm not having my first love right now. and babe, I want you to know tat, i really don't need to go all around the world, and find other ppl to assure my love for you. I know who is truthful and truly love me much. I do know, and i'm sure that, nobody else tat i want to spend the rest of my life with, other than YOU. what more can I ask, despite to have you in my life, and willing to spend the rest of your life with me, my WINNER...

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

我看了我们一起拍的照片。
忽然之间,很想让你,
让全世界知道,
我很喜欢你。
我很喜欢我属于你。
我很喜欢我有你。
我很庆幸我是你的,
我属于你。

Sunday, November 2, 2008

I just can't believe that
you're seeing me as such a person.
3 years and 9months we've been together,
can't you tell what kind of person I am?

I love you so much,
that I just couldn't,
never ever can I afford the risk of losing you.
and how would I do such thing?

It does matter to me,
the words you'd spoken.
'cuz I just don't want you to view me as such a person!
Can you understand?
It hurts me alot, when you say so.

Our love, and where's you trust?